Once in my spot, I would move very little. I would begin by sitting on the floor in a corner or somewhere out of the way.
When a child is molested or raped, they lose control over what is happening to them and their bodies, so while working with victims I was very sensitive about giving control back to them. I also guaranteed that they would never be identifiable in photos or interviews. Once I had this, I would always explain to the child (if they were old enough to understand) that I was working on a project about the bad things that people do to children, that it also happened to me, and that I really hoped that one day when people saw these photos and read these interviews they would want help to stop this happening to other children. Today, I believe that I am as much an activist for the rights and protection of these children as anyone else, and many police officers and child protection advocates remain my dear friends, as do many of the young survivors and their families.Īll my photos and interviews with children were made with consent from the child’s guardian or caretaker. It took me a very long time to gain their trust, but once I had it, I was considered one of them. Young survivors are surrounded by child rights activists and child protection officers whose absolute priority is the wellbeing of the children. Other contacts were made through individuals working in the field of child protection and healing. Most of my access came through the Johannesburg-based Teddy Bear Clinic for Abused Children and the South African Police Services. The more I researched, the bigger the project became. I was only with them for a few days, but I was shocked by the numbers of children involved, and decided to continue working on the issue. I went to work with the South African Police Child Protection Unit in Port Shepstone, a town in the southeast of the country. My exploration began in November 2002, when I received an assignment from a US-based women’s magazine to take photographs for an article on infant rape in South Africa. Through photographs, journals, artwork and testimonies from the abused and abusers, it offers a glimpse into a world of utter depravity, of absolute horror, but of incredible resilience, too, as young survivors struggle to rebuild their lives. It focuses on the crisis in South Africa, a country dealing with an epidemic of child sexual abuse, but it is not exclusively for South Africans. My Piece of Sky is the result of a journey into the world of child sexual abuse. It took me a very long time after that to trust a man – or anyone – again. I went through a bulimic phase and hated my body and the attention it brought. I hated it when men stared at me it made me uncomfortable. Well into my teens I wore a t-shirt whenever I swam. You lose your childhood really, your innocence is snatched away, and what little is left of that once pure child is now transformed into a sexual being, a child with a knowledge of things way before her time.įrom that moment on things were very different for me. I don’t think as a five-year-old you really understand that you have lost something when you are abused, but you have – something does change. The molestation could not have lasted more than a couple of minutes, but the incident affected my life in ways that are difficult to articulate. I cannot begin to imagine the weight my disclosure must have had on them – the grief and the rage furious at themselves for failing to protect me, enraged at the man for doing this to me, and infuriated at the world for allowing this to happen to their young daughter. Shortly after the incident, I told my parents about it. But, somehow, I knew it was wrong and I felt to blame for letting the man touch me. I don’t think at that age I really understood what it was that had happened to me.
When I was about five years old, I was sexually abused by a stranger. “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” The Teddy Bear Clinic for Abused Children, Johannesburg, March 2003 A nine-year-old relative who admitted to playing “sexual games” with her was later discovered to have been abused himself. A young girl attempts to flee from the examining room before a medical forensic examination.